The man in the maroon shirt: Miami Diaries

I was at this plush club in Miami, slicing the nite life step by step..Leaning over the balcony of the second level of the club, and he was right near me..the man in the maroon shirt. His cologne or was it his perfume..it was teasing my senses..He was downing his peg of mojito, and swaying to the beats..and somehow..I was attracted to him. Cupid had almost shot the arrow, I was feeling the pangs.

I kept stealing glances at him..I didnt want to get caught staring at him..married women do not lech, do they!! But it was hard to resist him..he had that quality in him somehow..to attract me.

He was superb on the small makeshift dance floor he seemed to have created for himself, and I was going weak in the knees..what was happening to me. I took a even larger swig of my drink and lit up yet another ciggy....I could not believe what was happening to myself. Was I getting too drunk, with just two pegs..maybe I was.

I wanted to touch him..feel him..right then and there,, but I did not know the Latino dance moves which he is so good at...what do I do. I kept swaying to the beats and stealing glances at this man...he was literally driving me crazy.

And then it happened..guess he must have realized how I was stealing glances at him..and maybe how I was aching to be in his arms...to get all wild with PDA...he volunteered to teach me salsa..or was it meringue...my memory is sketchy and shady..his voice was heavy and sexy...I was gone!! I fell over him like a smitten kitten...unable to match the moves with him, although he was a patient teacher with an intoxicated married female like me.

I was high...it was not the two pegs..it was him...who had intoxicated me..It just wanted him to wrap his arms around me..smother me with a few stolen kisses, whisper sweet nothings in my ears...but isnt that what teenagers do..I was almost happy being a teenager again..It felt good that there were still some drool worthy men left...Miami surely rocked.

I tried to busy myself in random dance moves, my mojito, and ciggies, but why could not I just stop admiring, leching, staring at the man in the maroon shirt!!! Why was he so attractive?

I cherished every moment that he held me close to him, stole in kisses amidst the semi darkness enveloping us all around..it felt good to fall in love with the man in the maroon shirt...all problems in my life seemed to fade away at that moment..as he was almost driving me crazy literally. I was not bothered about the world..time had almost stopped for me...and I was like living a dream.

I know we often regret the decisions we make in life, when things go wrong..I have also cribbed and cried and regretted...but it felt great to fall in love again, with the man in the maroon shirt..the man who drove me crazy on that night in Miami, just like the way he drove me crazy when I was a teenager in school..it felt good to be in his arms.....The moment made me feel proud of being married to the man in the maroon shirt for over an year. Amidst all the blues we have been together, its these special moments which make it worthwhile....no matter how much u fight with each other, when you still feel like falling in love with the same person again and again..u know theres hope, as there is love. Let Love conquer!!!!

3

LOVE AND HATE ALWAYS COLLIDE

what is love? well I am not talking about the song here, I am generally questioning myself!! Pranks said something very beautiful to someone..that Love and Hate will always collide, where trust is at stake.. and that got me thinking, as to what is love and what is hate.

What is love? well, i know i have already debated on that in a few previous postS of mine, and i do not want to get repetitive. Love is sometimes very destructive..often its love which pushes us to hate. And yes, again quoting Pranks..take the example of Tom and Jerry..they love to hate each other.

People complain to my friends that I am paranoid..maybe I am..maybe I am socially dysfunctional. Do I not realise how one has to survive in society? Maybe I do not. What does it take to survive? Are my rules of survival too odd..but my defence mechanisms have become to custom built I guess, to suit my eccentricities. I am emotionally high maintenance..often which becomeS a challenge for people to handle me. I know I am too cynical, but now I realise that there is nothing I can do about it.

Pranks told me something great...she always tells great things...even when she tells me that I have gone wrong, she says that in a great way...I love her for that. She told me that she was there for me...but she would not be there for me, when i suddenly wake up in the middle of the nite. I agree that its very valid..but now I have reached such a stage, when I can handle myself when I wake up in the middle of the nite..yes, I am proud to say that emotionally I have reached that stage.

What is Hate? well, I dont know how to explain that. A lot of people think that I have much more hatred in me, than the love in my heart..maybe its true. I always said I am complicated, didnt I. I should come with that warning...Too Tough to handle!!!!

Life is not about making compromises, and often life just becomes a big compromise...coz u feel that one big compromise, can bring a smile in the faces of people who have tolerated you for 28 years. so being passive helps...yes, u do snap a lot..but u dont take grave steps, because that might jeopardise the sleep of the few people who will probably never throw you out of their lives.

Love and hate willl collide...and maybe my paranoia will continue for those who have shamelessly branded me as paranoid!!! i have tried to change myself to suit different people at different times, and always that has become a problem. I am a free bird who is choosing not to fly!!! I will fly when I want to spread my wings again!

silence is great I know..but i am not suited for that greatness....I will continue to be the way I am, and lets see where life takes me...!!!

1

JUNK IN MY LIFE: A COMPLUSIVE HOARDER

I have always considered myself to be a hoarder, as I really cannot fathom how to throw out all the junk. And if thats not enough, I land up dragging much more junk than I can ever humanly handle. JUNK...now I should give that a serious thought. Well, I took almost two years to throw out a jerk of a guy I was dating..I just couldnt bring myself to do it some how. I had been hoarding up relationships. Although I had realized it was time to let go, I could not bring myself to do it. It took numerous fights, a lot of blows, a few dark eyes, puffed with make up, before on air appearances, and finaly, the hoarder in me gave way to the much needed exercise of throwing out the junk. I have always been bad at that. I can not let go of things easily, thats what i always think, and my mother always has to push me around to throw out all the junk I have been hoarding in my life.

What is excatly the problem? Do things get impersonal for me too fast? Do i lose interest and yet feeel obligated to carry on?I have not been able to figure that out..but i am working on that!!! My friend AB(i dont want to take real names here), always did the second round of pushing me around, after mom. He literally had to shout at me, for me to act often!! I have usually always gone by mom's and AB's and Pranks' judgement in a lot of situations, yet i neglected both mom's and AB's advice on a very crucial matter..and here I am..back to being a hoarder.

I realise that something is not worthy, and is completely driving me crazy every day, and even taking away my good nite's sleep, yet I feel too obligated to throw out the junk in my life. AB has moved on in life...He tried his best to explain to me, shout at me, plead with me, that I was making the biggest mistake of my life, in becoming a hoarder again. But I was too confused to even understand the significance of what he was trying to drill in my already complicated mind. But was i listening? Yes, I was..Ab is such a good speaker! guess, the hoarder in me was stronger for all this good advice to work. Mom has practically given up now..she tries to behave as if she is happy for me...but even I can understand what the truth is...she doesnt ask me anymore to throw out the junk...!!! Am i just chasing a tag? Am i worried that i will not function with a so called negative tag in society..But I have always been standing up for women's rights from high school days, and now in real life, I am getting scared.

I startle myself by my actions...how can I continue to be a hoarder even when I know what harm all this junk is doing to me. I try and think, maybe its not junk..and maybe thats where I lose out on the guts to throw this junk on to the gutter or the highway.

" I cannot imagine that my best friend has become so daft for the junk in her life." those were AB's last words to me. Although I assured him that I was not daft, yet I exactly did what he had been asking me , and begging me not to....not to hoard up the junk in my life anymore..I was not listening. My mom tried explaining that the tag was not important..I will survive..and life is not over...I am not even 30! But I was in a daze. I thought everyone was probably not understanding the way i perceive matters..,maybe what they think as junk, will prove to be something good. what was I thinking?

Now with all the days and moments and weeks and months,I am convinced to prove that I was wrong, and two of the people closest to me, Ma and AB were right..I need to throw out the junk...For few scattered good times, and a few smiles I cannot risk repeating the mistakes in my life....I want to fly..I want to soar and i can only do this when I have royallly discarded the JUNK.

Cheeers to MA and AB!! ..I am sorry that I am so late in acting on your advice. Hence while en route to a coveted holiday destination, cruising at more than 30,00o miles, in thin air, I reflect on the junk, rather than the sun and sands awaiting me...this is what happens when you are a hoarder.

1

I am complicated

I am a very complicated person...and i am sure this is a statement which everyone will agree to....all those who know me i mean.

Mrs. Mridula Chatterjee, a lady with whom i have fought, laughed and have spent many memorable moments....was a very criticised lady by one and all...and at the end of her life, she seemed to laugh it all off...she only told me that she had lived life according to her principles..often that had become a problem, for all those around her. She used to tell me that I was a lot like her, especially when i stepped out of being a child. I often didnt understand, why she re-iterated the fact like that...now with a few greys sneaking into my hairline, I think I understand my highly misunderstood paternal grandmom.

Yes, I am complicated..but thats who I am...I like being fiercely independent...letting go of my independence is not something which goes well with me..Yet I have often made the mistake in my life, of throwing out my own independence for what i had thought would get me and those around me some happiness...But the question is, what exactly is happiness..Is it that feeling which one gets after laying their hands on that shinny new dress, or buying that coveted pair of shoes, is it that feeling which u get of a sack session...is it the feeling which stems in your heart when your beloved pet dog or cat looks at you with droopy melting eyes, is it catching the best of times with your best friends over a whole lot of intoxication and friendly banter, is it quality time with your mom and dad and bro, after everyone has had a hectic week..well, maybe I do not know how to be happy...maybe thats where my complications starts.

Everyone regrets from the mistakes they make in life..even I do..except for the fact that I regret and crib over the mistakes and land up committing the same mistake..I had left my plush job at a well known national channel, when my then boyfriend lost his father back in Kolkata, and I was not getting leave to stand by him. I did that and felt happy..ultimately I saw that it wasnt worth it..I told myself, that never will I sacrifice my career, for a guy anymore..I had convinced myself...But I did the same thing again. gave up everything that I had worked so hard for...my career my hard work..for getting married...but a girl like me, with myriad complications is not at all good with relationships...and now I have same regret that I had way back in 2007.

Theres nothing wrong with the men I land up with..the fault lies with me...I dont know what my expectations are, and maybe thats the reason why I land up in more messes than I can handle...Now I realise why I am almost becoming a carbon copy of Mrs. Mridula Chatterjee... and maybe overstepping her at times.. But thats me...!!!! The problem lies in the saying " opposites attract," I have always found that statement to be attractive..but I always forgot about the second part of the statement "similars stay!!" So nothing wrong in all the men I have shared my life with..The fault lies with me..I always kept the "similars" just as friends, and bedded the "
"Opposites."The complicated me.

Heres a congratulatory note and a Thank You to all the men who have at any one pint of time, been the "Opposites," in my life..thank you for tolerating me and spending your precious time with me...but guys I am not worthy of your goodness...because I am complicated!!!!! Maybe its better that i be solitary..happy with my numerous dogs and cats , happy with my maternal brood, who will probably never throw me out...I think I should stop spoiling the life of men from now on..I am just not fit for relationships and its time I realised that..I have no right to spoil any more lives...!!!!!

2

CHOCOLATE COFFEE CAKE: MY BAKING SECRETS !!!

Baking is something, which I started early. Come winter, and I had seen my mother and my aunts whip up fruit cakes at home. It was almost a family tradition, and we waited with bated breath for either rum or bourbon fruit cakes by Ma, or the orange or lemon cakes by my aunt..it was always a delight to dig in. The baking process always intrigued me, and I started baking even before I knew how to boil an egg. It was quite a challenge to make the cakes better and more moist, and I started experimenting..cook books became gifts from everyone and before i realized I had embarked on the baking journey.

As I grew up, Ma almost stopped baking, and I became the de-facto baker at home. If I was home for any family occasion, be it birthdays or anniversaries, cakes had to be my gift. Somehow, it felt good, when I repeated the same family custom, when I decided to gift a freshly baked cake to one of the few friends I have in this alien country. The response was good...and I was on cloud nine. After I had posted pics of that birthday party on a social networking site, I got a lot of queries from my huge bevy of friends...everyone was interested to try their hand at baking, and most were feeling apprehensive..and I spent the day clearing the myth, that baking is not only pretty easy, its also a great experience. So here goes my basic cake recipe for all those who want to try their hand at baking for the first time...trust me , it is so easy, you would be baking every week.

Chocolate Coffee Cake:

Cake Ingredients:

Flour: 1 3/4 cup 

Granulated sugar: 2 cups 

Cocoa powder:3/4 cup

Eggs: 2 

Baking powder: 1 1/2tbsp 

Salt: 1 tsp 

Canola oil( use any white oil, but not olive oil): 1/2 cup

Milk:1 cup 

Vanilla extract: 1 tbsp 

Instant coffee powder, mixed with some boiling powder: 1 tbsp

Vanilla Butter cream Frosting:
Ingredients:
Solid Vegetable Shortening: 1 cup
Vanilla/Butter Flavor/Extract: 1 tsp
Milk or water: 7-8 tsp
Pure Cane Confectioner's Sugar: 1 lb: 4 cups
Meringue Powder: 1 tbsp(for stability)
Salt: A pinch

Procedure: 
Cream shortening,flavoring and water. Add dry ingredients and mix on medium speed (in a stand mixer or with a hand mixer,) until all ingredients have been thoroughly mixed together. Blend an additional minute or so, until creamy. This frsoting can be stored for around 4 weeks, in an airtight container in the refrigerator.

Chocolate Butter cream Frosting: 
Add 3/4 cup cocoa or 3 oz unsweetened chocolate squares, melted, and an additional 1 to 2 tbsp water to the recipe. Mix until well blended.

Cake Procedure:
Pre-heat the oven to 350F before you start the preps.

Ensure that all the ingredients are at room temperature.

Sift the dry ingredients one by one, in a large bowl. This ensures that there are no lumps in the batter.

Add in the baking powder, and use a dry whisk to mix it well, into the other dry ingredients.

Keep adding the wet ingredients to the dry.

Mix all the ingredients together, except the coffee powder and the boiling water.

Beat the cake mix only in one direction, as that helps in fold in air in the mix.

Gradually add the coffee mix, so as not to scramble the eggs in the mix. Mixture will be smooth, glossy and very runny.

Pour the mixture into a 9 inch greased spring form pan

Bake at 350F, for around 40 minutes, or till a skewer comes out clean , when inserted at the center.

Let the cake cool for around 10 minutes, then remove the spring form.

Use a spatula to loosen it from the side and from its base. If you let it cool down for longer, then the grease will start to solidify, and it will be difficult to get the cake out.

Cool it on a wire rack for a couple of hours.

Ice according to preferences !!

Enjoy baking!!!!!

2

Things to do before I am 30: Excerpts from my wishlist

Once I was dating a guy who had a cousin with a unique wish list..she wanted to sleep with 30, before she was 30. By the time I became acquainted with her, she was just about to touch 30, and still had that wish strongly imprinted on her mind. Quirky, may be not. Its all so relative. People and their wishlists. Nothing weird in them..even I have my own list of "to do before 30."

So what exactly does feature in my wish list..well..the list is so long. I have been updating my wish list over the years, and every

year I keep adding a lot more and deleting a few. And now when I sit down and try and remember my list of things to do before I hit 30, I dont

know where to begin.

Given the fact, what a die hard romantic I am, I always wanted to get into a love inspired matrimony before 30...I have done that!!!

Well let me resort to bullet points to summarize:

• I want to have one..maybe two...maybe a few Louis Vuitton bags. Kehne mein kya harj hain. Pradas and Guccis, Burberrys and Coaches..and a lot more. 

• Manolo Blahniks and Jimmy Choos ..its after all a wish list.
• Jackets in every possible colour..I am almost there,with jackets in brown, tan, beige, blue, violet, black , pink, green, already hanging in the closet.
• Sarees from every state in India..now thats a list which I have started updating..I love traditional stuff as welll..though only for occasions.
• Denims ..denims and even more denims...I already have so many ..yet I want more, more and even more...after all they are my second skin.

Now all of these deal with retail therapy....now for something different!

Pic Courtesy: Google 

• Wake up under the Tuscan sun.
• Romance is in my blood..so I want to go off on the very same trip, that Raj and Simran had been in DDLJ..filmi, I know, but come on, thats me. Very same trip on the Euro rail..Mount Titlis, Paris and all the European countryside in Bollywood style. I have been thinking of this trip ever since the time i watched the film for the first time...and i want to go for this trip before I hit that 30 mark in my life.



Pic Courtesy: Google 

• Own a winery. So that I can sample, create and enjoy wines whenever I want. I can take a stroll all amidst the creepers, when I am blue and pensive.
• Have no more weird 25 year olds being anywhere near the gentle giant. I have had enough trouble throwing out a couple of demented girls(A MBA student and an aspiring make up artist respectively, who had to be thrown out like plain rubbish..It was a tedious exercise)
• Have my own house, which I can plan from even the foundation. a house with separate rooms for my clothes, separate rooms for my shoes and separate rooms for my bags..I am an avid shopper, I know. A house where all my dogs can run wild..do whatever they want. I will run that house as and how I want..not have people banging at my door to wake me up..uggghhhhhhhhh. Have a bevy of domestic helps who shall be catering to my all my petty but important needs, so that I dont have to slog and be servile.
• Last but not the least....the most important wish ..get my career back on tracks...face the camera once again on prime time, as I used to. 

2

Winter: My Nemesis

I am a winter born, so ideally I should be comfortable with the cold climes, but with winter I meet my nemesis. Although me and my husband argue a hell lot, but I agree to a particular observation he has made about me. He feels that I am generally a person, who feels cold, even if its winter in Kolkata, for the sheer thought strikes me, that winter is here!!! So now that I stay in a city where temeperature dips even below -20 degrees celsius, is quite a wonder.

Kolkata has the reputation that it never gets really cold in the city..yet I have always managed to flaunt my stoles and light cardigans, right from the period following my birthday. Kolkata winters meant a nip in the air..a slight chill in the mornings..a season when coffee became tastier.Winter in childhood had its own charms. Winter meant PICNICS!! Yes, that annual family get together, which awaited that nip in the air!! Or even trips to the Alipur zoo, after all no one visits the zoo in summer, do they?!

Working in winter in Kolkata was only a problem, the days I had to do Lives from the airport. I used to pray and hope that flights do not get disrupted for the winter fog, so that I do not have to start sending in my first walkthrus before 6 am...but I was never so lucky..My stint of working in Kolkata, saw me at the airport from the wee hours of dawn, with me and my cameraperson and OB engineer literally cursing the weather Gods.

Being a small town girl, I had memories of how the countryside changed when it was winter. How the leaves of the trees were red..no it was not the fall colors..it was just the lateritic dust settling in. Winter meant the red school sweater, where we were perpetually striving to find the right shade of red, as recommended by my ever strict convent school authorities. Winter meant new cardigans knitted by my grandmom. Winter was always special, even though I find the cold to be my nemesis..quite a contradiction, I feel.

Mumbai, my mom's city, as I call it...was never cold during winter, so I enjoyed spending the New Years there. Winter vacations in Mumbai, during my growing up years, meant, I could flaunt my cocktail dresses at the parties, without having to bother of the temperature dipping down, or carrying stoles!!!

And then I faced the real winter per se..My first winter in Delhi, literally drove me nuts!! from having cold allergies, to wearing layers and layers, I was at my wit's end..and having to do your own cooking and cleaning in the cold, almost brought in tears. By the time it was time for my second winter in Delhi, I was well armed. I had my stock of winter wear, which I mixed and matched every morning..I didnt want to dress up similar every day, did I, given my profession as a television journo!!!

So when it was all set that I was to make Kansas City my home for the next few years, I was quite tense. I had read up and heard from my then boyfriend and now husband, that it does get bitterly cold. OMG, I thought...My nemesis is here..I will go sick like crazy..maybe I will even have worse cold allergies than I used to have in Delhi, after all the temperature dips down so low. But nothing of that sort happened..and thats when I realized how true is the observation made by my hubby dearest.winter is maybe just my nemesis in the mind..Here i am, being clothed quite casually when the temperature is at what gets the coldest in Delhi..I go for late night films with just a sweater!!! I have even felt gutsy enough to go for snow-mobiling in the Rockies,and even enjoyed the vacation thoroughly!

Facing my second winter in Kansas, but so far not a single case of cold allergies, I dont even remember being down with fever for the cold. I waltz around with hubby in tow for shopping expeditions when the temperature has dipped below -20!!!

Like many fears, my fear for winter being my nemesis, is just a fiction of my imagination. I feel cold when I want to feel cold, almost. Here I am, sitting in my apartment, with the heater switched off, in my Tshirt and pajamas, and scribbling away to glory and what does the temperature read..well, I havent bothered to check that!!!!

1

Reviewing The Tourist

"Love ke sala kuch bhi karega", well these words came to my mind, when I found Frank Tupelo(Johnny Depp) walking in to a room full of gangsters to save his lady love Elise Ward(Angelina Jolie), almost in Bollywoodish gait. A simple looking tourist, who has fallen in love with a lady who has crossed his path almost deliberately.

Well, The Tourist which does remind the audience of North By North West, also has a certain flavour of Bollywood. The story begins with Elise being kept under constant surveillance by the police in Paris, to track her lover, Alexander Pierce. It seems Pierce is wanted by the financial crimes department of the Scotland Yard,and is also known to have stolen money from a gangster as well. So its not a simple cat and mouse game..its two cats chasing one mouse. The only problem is that the two cats do not know how the mouse looks like, neither the cops nor the gangsters have a face to match the name...so Pierce becomes the elusive AP.

Elise receives instructions from Pierce, to find someone of his height, and literally take the cops on a wild goose chase..and she does exactly that. Here comes in the Kaplan connection of North by North West. She is on the path of mending her broken heart,as its revealed that she is hearing from Pierce after a hiatus. So she sets the perfect trap!

Enter Frank Tupelo, a math teacher from Wisconsin, who reads thriller novels and is quite enamoured by the lovely lady who decides to sit across him, while on a train to Venice from Lyon.The tourist is almost tongue tied where this lady is concerned...smitten is a better word, but he decides to maintain his silence. He is even invited by this mystery lady to share her hotel suite, albeit different bedrooms. Elise makes it clear that she loves someone else, but our Johnny boy is already in love.

Chase sequences from rooftops to the Venetian canals continue,with everyone thinking Frank to be the elusive Alexander Pierce. While the police discover that he is not the real man, for the gangsters Frank IS Alexander Pierce. Elise seems disturbed when Frank's life escapes the bullets, and she asks him to go back to the US. Here comes the Bollywooodish connect..Frank will do anything for his love..so decides to be by his lady love, even if that means facing bullets together. He can do everything and anything for her, and even risks his own life to save hers. Love can make people do meaningless things after all.

Jolie is convincing as the lover of a fugitive. Elise is made special with her sauciness blending well with her grit, to mend her broken heart..She is a mystery woman through out without having to change into super hero costumes or anything..the aura of mystery is well maintained. So when another facet of her identity is revealed to the audience, its a pleasant shock for them.

From the charismatic and quirky captain Jack Sparrow, to the Mad Hatter, Depp is uber convincing as the American Tourist, who is almost spell bound by the mystery lady. From jumping from rooftops, to speaking about his rights as an American citizen to the Italian authorities, Depp plays Frank Tupelo with great panache. While Jolie carries off her gowns and jewels very well, Depp looks a tad plump, in even the best cut suit..but I guess that goes a long way in convincing the audience with the lost in love and confused tourist image.

So when the film ends with another pleasant shock to the audience, Depp's fans were seen wearing a beaming smile, as they left the theatre. After Inception, a film which really did rivet the audience. Love stories are often regarded as meangingless by many, but this is a love story with thrilling twists and turns. A good watch. So enjoy the trip to Venice with the Tourist, where the perfect trap awaits.

PICTURE COURTESY: GOOGLE 

0

Its the little things which count...which we often ignore

Its a cliche, that we often ignore the small and little things in our life, and tend to look for greater happiness..yet we all do it!!I had been doing that myself, till I realised that I was missing out on so much, and I never bothered to cherish these small memories!!!

So decided to remind myself of some such moments, which have had a great significance in my life...and I took so long to appreciate them.

Well, now who do I begin with ..guess Ma..I always felt bad whenever me and Ma argued a lot,and then I was flustered!! But I forgot about all those moments when we just chatted up, about any topic under the sun!! It was just wholesome fun. I remember one weekend afternoon, when my brother and father were away on a trip,and me and mom were alone..and I was generally feeling low, that none of my friends could not make it for a night out, as planned by me. So ma told me, that since I was not having the night out with my friends..lets do something different..why should we wait for the night to party, when we can party now...I didn't quite understand what she meant!! And voila, the vodka was out of the fridge and the music was on..we danced and we sang together and we drank....I was smiling again.I didn't realise how much that celebration meant to me, till very recently...how precious those moments shall always be for me. Love you!!

At 11pm, on a cold winter night in Kansas, I am hungry, even after having dinner outside..and i just mention that to my husband(i know, i am quite a nagging wife). The man is dog tired after not having even slept enough in the last 48 hours, for the sheer load of office work. He has already taken me out to the mall,and treated me to a Chinese dinner..he has done his share for the day. Well, he just gets up,and starts cooking spicy chicken ..all for me!!! That gesture was oh so sweet..maybe had it been earlier, I would not have understood the significance of this gesture, but now, with the first few greys sneaking into my hairline...I have learnt to appreciate the warmth and the love in such beautiful moments. I keep complaining about what he does not do, or all the ways he has hurt me, the wrongs he has done, maybe I do overlook, all the little things he does for me...I really want to make up for all of that. Well, at least he puts up with my eccentricities and all my mood swings,which I feel is quite an achievement on his part. I am not an easy soul to deal with, in the first place. Love you!!

My brother...we have quarreled, fought, been at blows, at over the most trivial things..but the way my brother stood like a rock beside me, behind me, in front of me, with me, when I was going through one of the biggest crisis of my life so far, ...is beyond any word of appreciation. What he did for me everyday, be it talking to me nineteen to the dozen, pulling me out of the house for late night films, or getting all cousins together, so that I smile,amidst all my blues...giving me confidence at every step, when i was shattered. Finally when he hugged me at the airport, I was in tears,and did my best to hide them from him...my little brother had become a man!! Love you!!

I always tell her, I miss her.. be it when times are blue or when times are rainbow hued..I miss my Pranky!! She is always there for all my ramblings, be it any time of the day ..she is all ears for me, even if that means sneaking out of meetings to take my distress calls! I have great moments with her, all of which are precious to me, but whats very close to my heart, is what we did at her place one night. We had been to one of our favorite eating joints and eaten and drunk to our heart's content. However in the middle of the night, we wanted some more action, so we sneaked in to her kitchen and made green salad, and trust me, till date that remains one the best accompaniments with beer..A moment I shall cherish for a lifetime, the way we made that salad together,and the way we enjoyed ourselves.Love you!!

I was at the check-in desk of Lufthansa at IGI a few months back..I got a call from my Tung(another special childhood buddy, like Pranks) and her husband...and we just exchanged just about a few words, as I was having trouble locating my luggage from Jet Airways..and its the concern, the warmth and the love in Tung's voice, which saw me smiling all through the intercontinental flight amidst my stomach flu!!!! Love you!!

Ranjana ..or Ranju as I call her, my childhood best buddy..a friend whom i had thought, I had lost out on , who has made the best re entry in my life so far. One afternoon, Ranju dropped in at my in-law's place, when i was in kolkata, this summer. She told me over the phone that she was a bit disturbed, and so wanted to see me...and after she had left, having a spent a few hours with me, i realized that she was not the one who was disturbed..she knew what I was going through, and she wanted one afternoon of mine to be special, amidst all the blues, so this was her small effort to ensure that I was smiling at least that day!!! Love you!!

And there is someone else...another friend of mine-"A", who always tried in his own way to make things special for me..which I often did not realize..from telling me what to say on air, when I am super tired after a day long coverage.., to just being there for me...I just need to shout out to him, and he is there to deal with my demands..After having shifted to Kolkata, I had once been to Delhi for work. I just had about two hours to spare, and he decides to dump all his work, and take me out for a spin to one of my favorite places in the city, and drop me back in time for my flight. A friend who has always had the guts to tell me on my face, in the rudest of words, as when i have gone wrong!!! I appreciate all that you have done for me over the years. My guardian angel, almost!

My life would lose its half its charm if it did not have such and many more special moments from these lifelines of mine.

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Rum lover's dream holiday: Puerto Rican diaries

RUM...we never joke about it, do we....I mean all fellow rum lovers!! my brother often says that I am married to rum, well maybe I am.

One good thing, the rum doesn't cheat me ever, and will not ever..I don't have that fear with my RUM.

Honeymoon in Puerto Rico...was my husband's idea...an idea I found uber romantic, in the run up to my social marriage(given the fact I married the same man twice...and bechara faithful rum lost out). Ultimately the honeymoon got postponed to be the anniversary celebrations, and idea of rum kept jingling the loudest jingle...the land of the pirates ..the land of rum...here I come as i said to myself.

Life has always played too many games with me.... I know , I can almost hear one of my childhood buddies, literally shouting and saying, your life credits being remade on celluloid. Yes, I agree to her totally...so I was a bit apprehensive about this RUMmy trip. For once, life was fun and games, in the Caribbeans.

Needless to say I doused myself in rum, yet seemed to enjoy each and every trip, the rum offered me. Puerto Rican Rum has its own tang, and why would it suit NOT my Indian palate...after all the main ingredient in the most famous Puerto Rican rum, is Indian sugarcane...I was astounded when i heard that during a tour of the biggest rum distillery in the world.Bingo...no wonder my connect with Rum. Rum seemed to follow me wherever i hopped on that archipelago...and I for once enjoyed in a very guilt free fashion..

Maybe what my brother had always said...was in fact true..that Rum was my first husband..and here I was romancing Rum in the lanes and bylanes, and even the choppy waters of Puerto Rico.

An awesome catamaran ride on one the choppiest waters in Puerto Rico, meant arming myself and my husband with sea sickness medicines..the biggest warning on the medicine packet was to avoid any sort of alcoholic beverages...i read that loud and clear. Once the boat started, my whisky loving husband , stuck to his coke, coz whisky is not served in the land of rum. and i found myself downing all sorts of concoctions with rum..Cuba Libre and Pina Colada to name a few. Maybe i didn't mention that my tour of the rum distillery had also seen me down a couple or so of my favorite rum, earlier that day. And i said to myself, bring on the motion sickness...Everyone kept commenting on the boat, that it almost felt like a roller coaster ride, the choppy sea and the catamaran....and me being scared of roller coasters, seemed to be just enjoying...I was even swaying myself to the loud and thumping music playing on board...I kept smiling to myself that Rum was holding my hand..so I had nothing to worry about.

A trip to another Puerto Rican island, saw me dousing liberal amounts of Pina Colada. As with most people, visiting the island of enchantments or the rum capital of the world, Pina Colada had become my favorite cocktail, because i was in its birth place. 

Rum is criticised as being crass, heavy..but for rum lovers like me and many many others, its a drink, which is oh so smooth.....and to an extent even therapeutic I should say. My brother once treated his sea food allergies all over on his face, by washing them with rum twice a day...and voila it was cured, where even medicines seemed to have failed. And for me, rum is always therapeutic....it always lends a healing touch to me !!!!!!!!

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Love and Lust..Forgive and Forget

Love and Lust.. two things whose meanings have always been too clear for me. Criticised by friends and family for being a hopeless romantic, love was always a big part of my existence....I was in love with the idea of falling in love itself....see,i told u, what a romantic I was.

Lust is something, i was always maybe a bit scared about...I had heard how seemingly sweet couples became absolute strangers to each others, when one turned lusty...and I always felt that lust is something which will never creep its face in my life ahead.

But as its said, one should not fear anything a bit too much, because that's what hits you the hardest at least once in your life, and if you are severely unlucky, then the lightning will strike you more than once.

Well, I have a best friend, whom i have known, since December 2nd, (lets keep the year a secret, what say!!) And she was equally a hopeless one,when it came to matters of the heart and shared the same ideas about LOVE and LUST. No wonder we are best of friends!!!

And everyone always told her, that her life and her adventures and misadventures credited being in a best seller or may be a blockbuster,and she always laughed it off...was her life so filmi, she often wondered.

Well, she was a successful television journalist, had just found her first love again...life was on a roll for her...what could ever go wrong.

What she didn't realise was that her life was truly very filmi...so things could not be smooth for her for a long long time...the ride had to be bumpy....and it would be Love and Lust which would show their faces in the ugliest of ways.

She was over the moon, when a boy she had fallen in love with, when she was 16, walked back in her life, when she was 26...and they decided to marry. Well, marriage, why not, she thought!! Many friends turned sceptics, and did try to warn her just to be a bit careful....coz normal life can not usually be so mushhhyyyyy and filmi, can it!!!

She was immune to reason, madly in love.....so marriage it was and a big break to the career as well....so it would be just Loveeee in their lives..!!

Well, till Lust decided to get UGLY with her.

She used to laugh at her mother and aunt when they sat glued to the television sets,soaking in the K series dramas. Almost falling out of her chair in laughter, and shouting out loud, did all this stuff ever happen in real life....NO...Never.

The sickest joke....her life almost resembled a Lust episode from any popular soap opera!!!

The man she had loved, ever since she knew what love meant to adults, was cheating on her. Lust had finally found a presence in her life. How could it happen to her? Hers was a more than perfect love story..the man had come back in her life...she had not gone looking for him, in the wild wild world...how could he cheat on her?! But he had. The exchange of internet communication which bore testimony to the Cheating , to the Lust..stared at her from the screen of her laptop...memories kept coming back to her, of all the happy moments she had spent with her man, all of which seemed so contrived and meaningless...and the fact her LOVE(read: her man) had turned LUSTY when she was recovering from the loss of her first child!!! Boy, that beats even a K series melodrama...why is her life so filmi, I wonder!!!

And then she heard the twin words...Forgive and Forget....two of the toughest words of the English dictionary for her.

He simply said " He was sorry...... he didn't understand how one behaves when one is married." She wondered, she never knew one had to go through a special training to learn how to behave when one is married!! Quirky!!!!!!

His family turned the situation even nastier...and kept badgering her...that since she is a woman...its her duty to Forgive and Forget...because men make mistakes, dont they!! oh Boy, I wonder how this seemingly ruthless brood would have echoed the very same words, if their happily married daughter had to face the same fate!!!!

And that is when she learned , that Forgive and Forget are two things which are almost impossible.

She was almost on the brink of a meltdown, or should I say, a breakdown.....but she even avoided that...Her maternal family and her friends are the reason why she has learnt to smile ...she tried to walk down the twin paths of Forgive and Forget, to bury the hatchet called Lust or Adultery...but as she says these days, its one of the longest walks of her life!! See, told you, her life was filmi at every step..doesnt it seem like a script for a Bollywood blockbuster.

She does smile a lot these days....because she has chosen her poisons well....Ignorance is bliss after all.

And yes, she is till quite filmi..despite all the Lusty roads that her Love walked on...she still finds herself Loving him...lucky guy , I should say!!!! The man should praise his stars, that she still loves him..and she didnt sue him left, right and center, for adultery.

Wonder now, if they made a film on my best friend's life, what would the star cast be like...well....that could do for another brainstorming session. Filmi very filmi!!!!

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